or at least there isnt an instant win win situation.
and you just have to do. and continue doing.
until things just aren't anymore.
and then they are just what they are, and you look back and it all didn't really seem so hard after all.
and everyone is happy.
and it all just becomes a small and good memory.
i am going to enjoy the journey for a bit, even though it doesn't feel quite right.
lets see what happens.
i am a lucky girl:
to have good friends to drink the above beverage with after such days......
and a good, patient, and angelic husband who never comments on the dirty kitchen or tired baby or giant bag of dirty cloth diapers i leave him with when we all know that the above situation takes at least two (on a good day) to tackle......
and a nice sock.
and an almost second sock.
and also, sometimes, it feels good to just sit, and listen.
i went to sleep hoping i was going to wake to a winter wonderland, but alas, just an inch.
i had big plans for us take a cold and snowy hike this morning, but by the time we ate breakfast and were ready to get out the door (that takes a while you know) most of the snow had melted.
after some brief errands, i settled back in with my new favorite beverage: a frothy hot milk with vanilla bean paste mixed in. surely the most heavenly drink on the planet.... and got a wild hair to start some a sourdough starter.
i took some inspiration and knowledge from the river cottage bread book and set to beginning my journey of master sourdough bread making and i am not going to lie, i did envision my rye sourdough starter becoming so flavorful and delicious that i would keep that same starter for 20+ years, and people would request a small dip of my special starter for christmas and birthday presents.
meanwhile, while i was knee deep in a very fruitful daydream, crosby was knee deep in the spice cabinet. the spice cabinet and the dishwasher are his current favorite hangouts, and i pretty much encourage any and all shenanigans that occur in the kitchen. this was an especially shenanigan-full day as crosby was concocting his own little mixture of deliciousness.
baking soda is never to be forgotten amongst the list of delicious items to eat and flavor dishes with.
toothpicks top the list as best rattle.
if the dishwasher gets opened when you have just about gotten the curry powder opened and you can get a fork to help with the rest of the way, you have really hit the jackpot.
after a bit more exploring and tasting, we headed out of doors for a little fresh (cold) air.
at the end of the day, my spice cabinet is newly organized and clean.
our woodstove is maxing out.
my camera is full of images of life: snow. stick eating. spice cabinet ridiculousness. my new sourdough starter. cats hogging the heat.
ps. before you tell me i am crazy, neglectful, insane, unfit to be a mother: as a former montessori teacher, i seem to always allow Crosby to explore his environment (which i have semi childproofed) and i pretty much consider any destruction or craziness a practical life experience. and i like it that way.
oh, and i'll let you know how the starter goes. and my future sourdough starter business.
after starting the first loaf of bread and placing it in the oven to rise....
after pouring the first cup of french press coffee.....
as decorations came down.
as the tree came down, ornaments off.
a gallon of water was spilled on the floor, courtesy of the faulty tree stand.
a major sudden and unpredicted rain storm came through and rained on all of our uncovered seasoned fire wood.
since i had checked my negativity at the door of 2011, i brought out the new perspective.
i forgot about the messy house that i vowed would be cleaned by the first stroke of midnight.
i cleaned up the million pine needles.
we wiped up the water.
we covered up the wood pile.
i packed away all of the ornaments and remnants of the holiday season.
i thought of just 30 days earlier when we had gotten out every last bit of holiday garb, and we watched national lampoons christmas vacation, drank some homebrews and i opened the boxes of ornaments and lights that had been packed away last year 2010- on a wet cold day in the last month of my pregnancy.
today, i wondered about what all would change between now and next thanksgiving when i get out all of the christmas stuff again, for another holiday season. what will crosby's voice sound like then? how much life will we really live between now and then, and most importantly how did we make the most of 2012?
i always think that when you wake up January 1, there will be visible magic that will inspire and delight you into the new year. but i guess the truth is, you kinda just have to make your own magic.
and then sometimes, things just fall into place, courtesy of the universe.
so, right now, it is super sunny. and windy. and the light is literally spilling through the windows.
i'm off with my camera to document the first day of 2012.
ps. today is day 1 of my 365 project. am i crazy for attempting this? i think so not.